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welcome to my blog (: The BLOGGER'S Rights: 1. To blog about any content that is humane. 2. To blog about any content that is not against the law to blog about. 3. To express her own thoughts. The READER'S Rights: 1. To ignore any posts that he/she feels is offensive. 2. To not read this blog if he/she finds it disturbing/annoying/revolting. 3. To give any comments on any contents on this blog. 4. To express his/her own thoughts.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
this is my cool wallpaper. recently i am getting quite affected by magritte's ceci n'est pas une pipe.
3:12 PM
i now know why we always end up with a short hair length than we want. they cant cut to the length that we want the hair grows quite fast then after a few days it'd be longer than our desired length then we need to cut again. so they might as well cut a little shorter so we dont have to go to the hairdresser's every two weeks.
3:05 PM
i WOULD want to move to wordpress. .. it doesnt have nice skins.
2:23 PM
Saturday, February 27, 2010
during IH lesson: someone asks teacher: "then wont we be contradicting ourselves?" person next to her says: "IH is all about contradicting yourself" LOL
8:51 PM
"gosh so hot i can swim already" "if you can swim, i can drown."
8:38 PM
i just got a haircut. i likey (: SPEAKING OF LIKEY I MISSED HANNAH MONTANA AND THE LIKE. ): ): ): NEVER has time to watch. only last week. or was the wk before? i think that we're all being treated like machines. just that it's not humans who're controlling us. it's other bigger, more powerful machines. somehow i also think that most of us learnt the term "ironic" from la lessons instead of elsewhere.
5:46 PM
seeing "Economics tuition" ad on facebook reminds me of this incident: during ki: mr low: anyway, i trust that all of your here will be doing econs in jc, so- me: NOO. *stares hard at mr low* lol.
1:57 PM
didnt get to do it last year. yeah im determined this year. no matter how much trouble and trembles it takes. surprise.
1:04 PM
Friday, February 26, 2010
still remember that time in taiwan when they make us sit on stools to drink the ginger soup. and i still remember that time during class chalet when we went to watch the sunrise. warmth from within (:
3:45 PM
i NEED to find some constructive things to do on friday afternoons. man, im wasting my time. at least math is in front of me now.
3:34 PM
Thursday, February 25, 2010
crap i always want blogger to remember me but i always press enter just like it's part of my password and then i always dont got the chance to press remember me. how stupid. today at the hc bus stop i saw -- what seemed like 2 black feathers. OOOH, quill pen potential, i thought. yeah i somehow have this quill pen obsession.. and i even had the faintest idea to pick it up. and among it was such white yellow colorful stuff. and then i saw red. red legs. UUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHH i screamed. it was a squashed bird. it must have been there and a bus must have come and neither of them seeing each other and tada, the public 2D sculpture on the road, waiting to horrify any souls who land their sight upon that direction. well. disturbing is the only word i can use to describe. u must think i'm evil. why the hell did i just post it here when i think it's so disgusting? anyway today geography lesson was fun. he mentioned the weather station outside the geo room. and i got inspired and asked him why not we open the curtains so that light can come in and we cant off the lights and save electricity? then he went to pull up the curtains. and he took a long time fixing it. finally he opened two of them and showed us that small wind thingy. then we said we wanted to go out and look at it. and i think the coolest part was that we all climbed out from the library window directly onto the "rooftop" area with that wind thingy. it was so cool. shouldve taken photo. and he said bringing us out on "fieldtrip" seems worse than bringing pri sch kids out. LOL. annual earth hour and DoS is round the corner again. behold. HAHAHA today investiture was so funny. each time she says "guests", the whole LT echoes after her and start imitating her "guests" pronounciation. it was so funny because it was really loud and the whole LT was literally filled with sounds of the word "guests" everywhere instantly after she says it. when they say "invested SLs" it just reminds me of stocks and investments and stuff. AND YOU DO NOT GODDAMN DIFFERENTIATE THE POWER ONLY ONCE. DAMN IT. you DID the example and you differentiated it TWICE and you tell me you only differentiate it once. and when i answered your question as to why was her working wrong, you didnt get my explanation and think i am wrong. and she totally kept us back for like ten minutes after lesson ended. it was recess, damn it. you differentiate it until you get the OTHER expression, for example, if it's a sin, you differentite till u get a cos. if it's a cos, till you get a -sin. and so on. GAH that's why i hate math you know. they try to make it more understandable by introduing confusing elements into the question and most of the time my definition of 'simple" is so different from math teachers'. so i always end up with workings that are "too complicated or redundant and potential sources of careless mistake" where I THINK THAT MY WORKINGS CAN LESSEN THE POROBABILITY OF MAkING CARELESS MISTAKE. math and physics and chem are the worst now. what's with nomenclature and electrons and WHAT THE HELL YEAH. i mean, how the hell did the goddamn electron in the cloth and plastic and what not manage to flow to another substance without chemically combining with them or after going thru some chemical process or something how do electrions just flow everywhere they like then what if my fingers are in contact wit hthe keyboard the electrons from my fingers are also flowing to the keyboard la. WHAT CRAP MAN. science and math is all about crap. and inventions and discoveries and everything that's not natural and everything's that BASED ON HUMAN'S SENSES WHICH CAN'T EVEN BE RELIED ON IN THE FIRST PLACE. \
10:29 PM
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
sorry, that day i didnt mean to go disturb you. i just thought you didnt mind some company but apparently i was wrong.
10:36 PM
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
i still remember clearly when 100.3 radio said “我是鼠一,我是鼠二,我们祝您有一个数一数二的新年!”two years ago. and i was totally =.= in the car. i wanna prove him wrong, i wanna prove them wrong. but the first step is, GET OFF THIS COMPUTER. damn it im gonna turn extreme again. it's the only way.
10:01 PM
today push ups during pe was so funny. he made us count to 10 while we were up. then we huh.... then the second time, we count faster. and he said "counting has never been so fast" hahahaha third time, we counted even faster fourth time, he made us count one to ten in chinese it was quite funny then count one to fifteen in chinese. then count from fifteen to one in chinese then count from thirty to forty in chinese. test our chinese =.= and the whole time we were just speeding thru the numbers then he made said "sing the school song" then we HUH???!!! then we didnt. then he made us do it again. and some ppl sang. but we gave up. then we did it AGAIN and this time we sang the whole school song in a horribly off tune manner and it was so funny and everytime we reach the last part of each paragraph we just "la la la la la la la duan lian shen xin". LOL haha i think that was the funniest pe lesson ever.
8:54 PM
Monday, February 22, 2010
LOVE MY WALLPAPER.
11:06 PM
why humans allow their hair on the their head to grow so long? maybe to some other creatures it's as disgusting as letting armpit hair grow so long. HAHAHAHAHA so funny!
10:56 PM
WHOA. i cant believe i used to talk like that in sec 1. back when everyone was still .. so.. naive. and insensitive. and unserious. wish we could go back to that time. i'd certainly love to give up whatever i have now in exchange for the past. hm. maybe next few years later when i look thru the conversations again i'll be so surprised i talk like that in sec 4. yeah, and then i was so surprised at some of the things i said.. i was just so surprised. i thought that i had always just been me. didnt know i changed so much. and i hadnt know that whatever in sec 2 was really linked to sec 1. it's surprising how sec 1 year was so influential yet so different from now. dunno how to put it. not in a poetic mood, not that i can be poetic just that i dont feel like emoing and all that crap. i feel like laughing when i read some of the conversations. i cant believe i talked to so many people in sec1. esp the people whom i thought i didnt really talk to in sec 1. i actually did. and i realized i added so many contacts in the first few months of sec 1. but then till now, i havent even got half of 412 on my contact list.
8:21 PM
dont know how your name appeared in my dream. freakiness.
7:00 PM
Sunday, February 21, 2010
i could consider working at USGS. seems like they can earn quite a lot. that's not my point, but yeah, that's certainly a bonus, so why not. am reading shan mi he lang hua de xia tian for chinese reading and the shan mi reminds me of chang. cuz shan mi's this boy who migrated to US who went back to taiwan for summer break. haha math tuition feels fulfilling. EARTH HOUR MARCH 27 !!! shall start planning. tomorrow cup design. i've decided. aint nobody's gonna scold me. i feel bad for slacking always during aep. but i really have no time to go shenton at NIGHT and no one's free to video me. duh. who IS free nowadays? even as i am blogging now i am not doing so because i'm free, it's on my to do list as well. now we reach the "definition of free". i guess. CRAP. ohwell. they'll just have to wait. .. woah. i need a sheng package to tell people what is sheng and how it looks like and that it can ACTUALLY PLAY A MELODY. lol. kikki K designs are so simple and so nice. im beginning to like swedish designs. i mean, ikea's from sweden too! maybe i could be a designer in sweden. but i'd be so bored.. wonder why singapore's not as boring as other countries actually, arent they essentially the same? what else do we do here that we cant do overseas? talking to friends? acrylic paint is getting on my nerves. so are shirts. and dresses. dunno, but i think graces promotes shopping for clothes with friends. um, part of growing up? sometimes i just hate to grow up. adults' world is so sad and miserable and full of crap and locks and prisons and anchors and cages and robots money computers everything bad.
10:01 PM
Saturday, February 20, 2010
firstly, some cameras make people look FLAT on the both edges. it's damn ugly and i am proud to say my camera doesnt have this defect. i sound like a bitch. maybe that's what i'm turning into. (thanks to society.) AND CRYSTAL PHONE IS NOT USER FRIENDLY!!!!!!! gosh i think this is very different for everyone it's no good asking others about a phone's user friendliness, because some people are just more stupid than others. (like me) 买什么最浪费钱? 答, 买只穿一次的晚礼服最浪费钱. even a three thousand bucks piano aint as wasting.
10:45 PM
they say it's scary how ppl change when they go jc. duh. now i know. how can one not change after being forced to attend a formal dinner and after more than one whole whole week of stupid orientation "when we cross over"? it's all planned to change us. in a bad way. and u know how our school focuses so much on developing leaders? as evidence have shown, exactly because our school kind of over-do it a little, few councillors "on the other side of the bridge" are from our school, and most from other schools. why? because after being leaders in this school, many people have gotten enough of their tiring duties and decided that it's easier and less tiring to just be one of the followers. that's why. so it's not good to get us exposed too early, because we'll still have the child mindset. and their effort goes to waste. that's a pity. and it's scary to see how one can change in a matter of days. i'm just not used to it. is it really very fun? i've tried but i really really don't like it. so now i have the right to say i dislike it, because at least i've tried. but it's just due to the tyranny of the majority that we just OUGHT to wear a dress for a formal dinner. i think that if the school focuses on "bringing out your best self", it would be much better and happier for everyone than "graces". graces restricts us to be a lady, WHICH WE ARE YET NOT so they dont have to push forward these things. i don't know, maybe it's just that i'm childish. or that i'm like michael jackson. but anyway make up sucks. the life out of humans. what if i am so ego and says that i already look god damn nice and i dont need any make up? so the boss will sack me? so people will look at me like i'm not wearing clothes? according to my dad, yes. i might have chosen "tyranny of majority" as my coursework subject if i knew about it earlier. so far this year, it's the best thing i've learnt from LA because i'm finding it applicable to many many things, especially nowadays, especially HERE. within this boundary.
7:51 PM
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
damn it it's useless trying to explain to you. when i know exactly what i want to do you must come in and give me some crap ideas that does not in the least sense match whatever i am going to do. then when i need ideas you just leave it all up to me. i hate it when i tell you about what i'm doing and you say something and turn it into YOUR project.
2:09 PM
Monday, February 15, 2010
"赵本山来了!" and the whole house gathers in front of the TV. that's how influential zhao ben shan is.
8:50 PM
Sunday, February 14, 2010
i am so busy these days, that i my mind doesnt even take a break while i shower. in the shower is when my mind is most clear. and then i will come out of the shower with acronyms for the things i remembered in the shower that i have to do later on. then i write down the acronyms, and end up not having time to attend to all of the things. even though i already spend a lot less time on my blog these days, i still find it almost impossible to complete all my work in time. yeah, IN time, not even ON time. i'm starting to play the piano more these days. and that takes up lots of time. i wonder why the downstairs TV's sound travels a lot lot lot faster to my ears. liu qian is on TV now. AGAIN. i will get sick of him sooner or later at this rate. IF HIS SHOW IS LIVE, that means he must have flown from china to taiwan today. wow. HAHA i remembered one time on TV when liu qian wore this really constipated looking shirt which was all twisted. and SOME costume artists are REALLY sucky. SOME. liu qian looks like when he wears specs. i am afraid now. so afraid. but there's actually nothing to be afraid of, it'll be normal once again. i wont feel a thing. it's just that at this point in time i am afraid. does that mean i am just being stupid? does that mean i am not, just because i am still afraid, instead of feeling normal? or maybe i jst went one round saying nothing at all. i need to be both more clear and more vague. it takes skills. skills. liu qian is getting funnier and funnier. after so long of not being able to blog my thoughts on my blog, i find it hard to blog properly. but after this post i would have recovered from repression. i am recovered already right now just that i realize one can actually lose this connection with her blog. wonder who stills reads here nowadays. if people still do, they would realize how much this place have changed, in terms of tone. it's a sadder place now, aint it? i have a feeling i'm one tenth on my way to being retarded. i really do. maybe my blog can save me. or maybe it can kill me. but it's still cool how my life depends on my blog. because it makes me feel like i do not have a life. i dont want to have a life. i want a virtual life. that becomes my blog. i think i'm still sane now because i recognize what i just said is a little insane. 用谎言来验证谎言, 得到的只能是谎言. i want to learn zhu yin. it's not that hard once i have the patience AND TIME. the tiniest things scares the shit out of me. am i turning into an insect? if i dont have to go to school and do all that FUCKING lot of crap, i'd: learn jay chou song lyrics learn carla bruni song lyrics learn french learn painting go and find a taiwanese dictionary learn zhu yin play the piano all day and the guitar sit in windy and shady places and just think and stone and enjoy the wind i'd enjoy life more. or at least that's what i think. and your reply that criticizes my idealistic thought is so cliche. who cares about graces camp. it's the tyranny of majority. that's exactly what the camp is about. i could follow the crowd and slack and do what i'm supposed to. but i know i wont do a good job out of that. but mostly it;s cuz im lazy to think of what i could do. are we supposed to have lots of ideas? how do you expect us to? when you bury us, our creative juices with lots of mark schemes and assignments that you get back only to see "explain?" written all over your paper? i hat emark schemes. have you seen our math and ih papers? one whole page, dedicated to the mark scheme. i hate it when numbers are representatives of our abilities. it is never to be measured. especially not by numbers. words could do a lot better. i rmb someone somewhere said words do a bette rjob than numbers. numbers are dry, words are expressive. i hate math. i hate science. they are based on nothing but our senses and our minds which may totally be constructed, how do we even KNOW it's real. i do not believe in math adn science because i do not think they are real. someone is deceiving all of us with math and science. but how ironic, i cant say that once i say i think someone is deceivin us. anything for that matter. french sounds seriously nice. i regret a hundred times i quit french. i want to lose my mind because i am sick of thinking. this blog serves as a record of how one person turns from normal to insane. i dont want to be me. i want to be my blog.
10:29 PM
i dread jc.
10:29 PM
CCTV 4 has replayed chun wan at least 5 times now. it's so retarded! i bet they never show anything else esides news and chun wan for the whole of today. and im going to see liu qian for the 4th time in 2 days if i continue watching the chun wan that playing right in front of me. and the only way to make a day feel long is to stay up until after 12, and tell yourself "it's another day!" and go and sleep and wake up and tell yourself "it's still the same day!". ..
10:04 PM
facing some sort of a mid teen crisis. no longer sees the point in chinese new year. all the aniticipating, only turning a corner to see another long, empty, dull looking street. no longer sees the point in doing homework. no longer sees the point in working hard, and going to hwachong. no longer sees the point in achieving my goals the faraway, misty goals no longer sees the point in life no longer sees in the point in racing against time because time will always win unless i stop new year- dont run, run, run, stop and listen to your heartbeat. looking forward to the robot era when you dont have to do anymore housework? congratulations! you're already there. look no more. for here, we have got all the newest inventions, everything you need, anything you can think of, you just got to sign up, it's simple steps, but no backing out. it's a life time commitment. but we'll help you as much as we can, we'd make sure you'll live a comfortable life, not needing to think about anything else other than how to complete your work on time. everything's given, everything's fixed, you need not waste your time thinking baout useless things. the services we provide are the best you can ask for. everything's done for you, laid out, right in front of you, you can just close your eyes, and we'll lead you through.. trust us. it's a perfect, comfortable life... i'm such a sad person.
6:20 PM
What was i thinking??
11:38 AM
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR. no festive mood. though on friday it was nice to see people in red and red paper everywhere. last cny performance in nanyang was quite good. i just can't find bu neng shuo de mi mi dvd. the version that i want. gosh am i that outdated??!! it's only 3 years back. not like a decade or something. a number countable with ONE hand. anyway, even though all the teachers tried to give homeworks deadlines before cny, we've still lots of work to do, i've no idea how to finish and mr chang is alr a little pissed at my progress on coursework i better do somehting over this long weekend or he'd be quite mad i guess. i heard from my foster sis that hcjc is like.. offers a lot more freedom BUT they give you 1 demerit point each time you're late. it's ridiculous. and i heard their SMB is messy and everything. i bet when i go to hcjc, i'll end up suggesting lots of things. i've alr a long list of suggestions for nanyang. maybe i'd ge tthe "most suggestions contributed award" end of this year. not anticipating. damn. everyday i will some thing i want to blog about but then when i FINALLY get the time to sit in front of the blogger screen (which is like once is a purple moon) i forget EVERYTHING. damn sad. actually, lg crystal not so bimbo. cuz it's QUITE good. AND even my friend (who's a guy) thinks it's cool so i think it's not bimbo, or a guy wont think it's cool. i jus tlike the transparency ness. transparent plastics are cool! internet these days is getting boring. or maybe that's what i feel when i get cut off too long. yeah, that makes sense. ugh. FUCK. so much for happy chinese new year. what about, chinese new month?
12:45 AM
Saturday, February 13, 2010
OH MY GOD LIU QIAN IS DAMN ZAI.
10:33 PM
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
taiwan is nice. the movie makes the place seem so shi qing hua yi. and i totally agree with jan's "cultural atmosphere" theory. we don't have any. and i do not anticipate anymore. time passes much too fast for me to bear to anticipate anything. it's like, the tape is already fast forwarding and we're still looking forward. is the tape not fast forwarding enough? maybe, sometimes. why us ut that it's been like that for so long? actually, ever since it started. so i should get used to it by now. but the thing is, we get new ideas and thoughts and experiences everyday and that just changes our views. so. i'm not used to it. perhaps never. but it just seems like, it's the kind. sometimes i wanna give up on everything. what's the point in eating fast food everyday every meal? no more variety. and unhealthiness. i might as well stop eating altogether. just watching it go by. like standing by the road seeing a truck banging fdown an old lady. i could have pulled the old lady away. but we don't. we just watch it happen and do nothing. or maybe, we dont even see. we're blinded. or maybe like a rollercoaster in the dark. at high speed, we dont have control over therollercoaster it just goes. up and down and fast and slow. and we just let it all happen around us, not doing anything except scream. why then, in the first place, did we even get on to the rollercoaster. perhaps we didnt know of the consequences. but now that we know, it doesnt help either. we can't jump off from the rollercoaster. because we're strapped to our seats, and not knowing how high we are above ground. we'll die. i like the play from last year. my life is disappearing into another dimension. a non-existent dimension. a virtual one. and who said philo was sciencey and mathy? i hate science and math. because only misguided lices believe in them. and i do not believe in ki. we're humans, not god, how can we even try to find out the real truth, however far we go, we're still trapped within ourselves. we know that. but we still try to go beyond. but it's so futile. i am tired of thinking like that.
11:18 AM
Sunday, February 7, 2010
there is this old man opposite my block. every time i come home from school i can hear his hair dryer on. and i look, and i see this reflection of an old man in the mirror, who has like 1.5 cm long white hair standing up from his scalp, and there he is in front of the mirror trying to comb and style his hair. and he has no top on and leaves his window wide open. it's quite distrubing to see old man styling his hair when he has almost no hair. and i had a scary dream. i dreamt that i was going to be assasinated. i dunno how but one night i just seemed to know, but i was rather doubtful, i rmb there was this billion dollar thing going on too. like either take a billion or kill me. sth like that. but i wondered why on earth would my parents want to kill me even if they get a billion dollars. or was it that they were trying to help me end my depression or something. then there was a phone call, and i picked it up, this secretive female voice said "i'm the assasin... so tomorrow morning she'll walk to the mrt.. ." and i freaked out. i think the phone call was meant for my mum, but i just kept quiet and listened on, not making a sound. so i knew someone was out there ready to kill me the next morning i go to school? and i felt helpless. but my parents seemed normal. only that night we went for dinner at a restaurant. but they seemed normal. my grandparents were there too. everything felt so real. i thought i was really going to be assasinated. and i think that was the second time in my life i dream that i was going to be killed. it's so creepy. soooooo creepy.
9:23 AM
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
gosh already 1:36am. yes i stayed up to do graces design. now that im done with the final, i need to work on prep work. yeah, we all got it reversed. this shows that prep work aint much of a help, unless it's this huge project that's gonna involve many other people. my design disturbs me. soething's wrong with the leg and i just WANT to correct it but i cant cuz i used pen AND even if i were to correct it i dunno how to and i may ruin it even worse so. so i shall keep one eye closed for that. but it's annoying. at least im gonna hand in soon. i might as well dont sleep tonight right. i thought swans were graceful. but now i dont think so. its neck is not exactl ylong. and its body is so close to the head. it looks so short and squat-ish, how does it look graceful?? what a huge misconception!
1:36 AM
Monday, February 1, 2010
i was thinking of switching to wordpress. then i realized they dont got nice themes, except for one. so i abandoned that great plan. and went to blogskins to search for new skins, i am getting numb to this current one. it's been here for ages. never opened the template tab since dinosaurs ruled the earth. well. and blogskins hasnt changed much. and i didnt bother looking for new skins. too much choices. and i got to back my comp. i have a zillion things on my todo. graces. been the same every year hasnt it? i shall write, qin + shen+duan+pu = graces. school will be so happy yeah. bloody. harry potter. HARRY POTTER THEME PARK. i cant wait to go. i wanna WORK there. i wanna LIVE there. i want to disappear into the wizarding world. a quill, anyone? or butterbeer? - you know why? cuz you don't need anyone else.
9:54 PM
Yours Truly To put it negatively, I am just yet another human being on this badly overpopulated and ruled-by-money Earth, but on the bright side, I am proudly from 201'08 and I love 201'08.(: I love my CCA.(: I have big dreams.(: I believe in Squigglerism.(: I like using the penknife. It is convenient and neat.(: I am more than glad to be in Singapore, letting me be more than satisfied with life.(: Exits
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